Monday, December 19, 2005

A Cross of Chips

The Moose notes that this is the time of redemption.

Hallelujah and Praise the Lord! Now is the moment to fall to your knees and beg for forgiveness. The Abramoff hammer is soon going to fall, and it is the time to get right with Jesus.

Apparently, the would be Lieutenant Governor of the Peach Tree State Righteous Ralph Reed is a one-time sinner who has seen the light after bagging a few million from Casino Jack.

"Had I known then what I know now, I would not have undertaken that work,"

"I cannot change the past, but I can certainly learn from it," Reed said. "I am a better man and a better leader as a result."

Please, please stop, old buddy - you are bring a tear to the Moose's eye with these heart-felt sentiments of regret. Ralph "I was only the piano player at the bordello" Reed has been born once again! Get out the baptismal water and the hymnals. Are the federal prosecutors on old Ralph's tail or has the healing power of ambition triggered this bout of contrition?

Meanwhile, it appears that a highly-principled libertarian Ayn Rand type was also on Casino Jack's payroll,

"A senior fellow at the Cato Institute resigned from the libertarian think tank on Dec. 15 after admitting that he had accepted payments from indicted Washington lobbyist Jack Abramoff for writing op-ed articles favorable to the positions of some of Abramoff's clients. Doug Bandow, who writes a syndicated column for Copley News Service, told BusinessWeek Online that he had accepted money from Abramoff for writing between 12 and 24 articles over a period of years, beginning in the mid '90s."

"After receiving BusinessWeek Online's inquiries about the possibility of payments, Cato Communications Director Jamie Dettmer said the think-tank determined that Bandow "engaged in what we consider to be inappropriate behavior and he considers to be a lapse in judgment" and accepted his resignation."

Yet, some stout hearted conservatives are not about to succumb to the contrition. Here's one unabashed Norquistite,

"Bandow isn't the only think-tanker to have received payments from Abramoff for writing articles. Peter Ferrara, a senior policy adviser at the conservative Institute for Policy Innovation, says he, too, took money from Abramoff to write op-ed pieces boosting the lobbyist's clients. "I do that all the time," Ferrara says. "I've done that in the past, and I'll do it in the future."

That's the spirit! At least he is not stricken by faux guilt or remorse. In their heart, repentant and unrepentant conservatives, know that Gordon Gekko was right - "greed is good". Some were shills for Casino Jack and others sold their wares for Enron - the bottom line was all that mattered.

So far we have witnessed only the tip of the Abramoff iceberg. In October, 2006, the big event in D.C. will be the Great Conservative Contrition Crusade that will be held at the MCI Center. There, thousands of born again right wingers will denounce themselves and ask the Good Lord for Forgiveness for worshipping Mammon and pray that they will not sent to electoral damnation.

And at that event, former Majority Leader and Chief Sinner will raise his arms and declare to all those assembled,

"Having behind us the corporate interests and the casino interests and all the bible believing masses, we shall answer their demands for lobbying reform by saying to them, you shall not press down upon the brow of corrupt conservatism this crown of thorns. You shall not crucify Republicans upon a cross of casino chips!"

-- Posted at 8:27 AM | Link to this post | Email this post